2009-09-14

On Wisconsin - Headlines and Crap


For truly interesting Wisconin-ish information, go here.

To read my aimless babbling, see below.

There must be little question that it should be Odd Wisconsin.

Beyond the occasional froggy hitchhiker (watch out for their response to the excitement involved with going for a ride - much pee.)

Yes, it is true that a few serial killers, Liberace, Laura Ingells Wilder, Frank Lloyd Wright, Oscar Mayer, Orson Wells, Little Bastard, Georgia O'Keefe, and Les Paul are from here.

But it is the headlines we produce here that have drawn my need for entertainment.

Violent crime falls in Wisconsin as another headline declares and ammo shortage. Meanwhile, a drunken man takes a ride with a motorized wheelchair on the freeway.

And, oh, the places you may go while you're here!

Laws one should not break whilst here:

Connersville: No man shall fire a gun while his female partner is having a sexual orgasm. Figurative speech? We can only guess.

It is illegal for a married man to drink beer, masturbate or in any way have any sort of enjoyment.

It is against the law to chop onions within 200 yards of a gay man.

It is illegal to eat a woman’s pubic hair in public.

It is illegal to kiss on a train.

It is illegal to serve apple pie in a public restaurant without cheese.

It is illegal to wave a burning torch around in the air. Very troubling law for angry mobs seeking monsters.

Racine: It's illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.

Time travel is against the law.

You are not allowed to call your wife 'love' or 'darling.'

Oh, and below are our sister cities. This is me skittering to a halt as my brain has a dip in neuron zappiness.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I believe Wilem defoe and houdni are also from wisconsin.