That's Why I'm Easy

It doesn't take much to make me a very happy girl.

Today I was cheered merely by not locking myself out of the house when I took out the garbage.

Yesterday I was happy because no one tried to run me down with their shopping carts whilst I tried my hand at Christmas shopping.

Take joy where you can find it in the doses it is offered to you.

Smile, though you're in terrible danger...


Can You Hear the Heat?

I can.

Foster cat thought to be pregnant is not. I thought all along she was not. But the vet said yes, the people at the shelter I work with said yes, so she (Nina) remained.

She's put on a fair amount of weight since arriving here. Her coat is glossy and her eyes are clear. But the weight is not widening, firm weight. It's squishy "I get feed when I'm hungry and I sleep on pillows" weight.

This weekend, as my sister Dianne and my brother Paul and I painted the new family room and moved the furniture in, Nina cried plaintively from her room.* Dianne thought she was lonely. I knew better.

She does what I call the "Butt Dance." All who approach are greeted by a view of her furry bottom and her twitching tail. The legs dance in a frenzied up and down motion as if she were tap dancing on a hot skillet.

Her cries, sad at first, are now loud and constant. Each female has her own song of abject horniness. Nina's is:

"Meow! Meow! Eck-burr! Eck-burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

All day.

All night.

"Meow! Meow! Eck-burr! Eck-burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

Save me.

She's isolated due to FIV.

The Bad News on Monday Cuteness Buffer

I read the news today.

Oh boy.

Six people are missing in Oregon after they went to cut down a Christmas tree.

Two children still missing in Minnesota.

Cops emptied their guns into a man the day of his wedding
. One re-loaded his automatic in order to keep firing. Even the mayor is pissed off.

A group home caught fire in Missouri and killed ten.

A truck crash in Nebraska killed five.

An eleven-year-old shot to death a twelve-year-old.

The Sudanese government is rearming the feared militia in Darfur and no one is doing a damned thing about it.

A Chinese Aids activists trial has come to a stand still as key defense witnesses are "missing."

Rwanda's President Paul Kagame implicated in assassination of his predecessor.

There is an endless stream of bad news coming from the war-torn Middle East. That happens every day and many people have got to be numb to it by now.

Can I relate how much I don't give a flying fuck about Michael Richards and his apologies?

Or that some people consider peace signs to be anti-troops?

Or that people are shopping more or less than last year?

Give me some good news. Tell me people are still good. Be an Anne Frank for me. I'm feeling more than a little down and discouraged right now.

The "He's So Excited!" Mullet


Hot Dog!

Sold to the gamewhore in Topeka!

Auction for Sony Playstation 3 ends bidding at...... $9.99

Dr. Doolittle Hits the Skids

A View to a Kill

For those seeking a new philosophy to explain life....

I give you: Goat on a pole.

"On closer inspection, he realised that it was a man's private part."

House-sitting seems like a cushy job.

Until you find weird stuff in the bushes.

Superintendent Benjamin Mtsholi Bhembe of Hazyview, Mpumalanga, South Africa made a surprise discovery Friday when he saw a strange object in the yard of a house he's watching.

"On closer inspection, he realised that it was a man's private part."

Police were summoned.

Local residents were questioned.

But all to no avail.

Police urge anyone with information or a missing penis to contact the nearest police station.

Saved by the Mullet


"It pains me to watch my fellow villagers having to take care of their bodily needs that way."

On an Andean plateau in Peru the Peruvian people are quite horrified to find that their tax dollars went to the construction of an erotic sculpture park.

Quote from the article:

"People in Huayre are bemused by the uproar. National rulers, they figure, have been squandering their riches for centuries, so what's the big deal if Mayor Wenceslao Alderete hoped to attract tourists by gracing the village's central plaza with outsized images of genitalia and of the maca root, a tuber traditionally consumed as an aphrodisiac?"

So Many Captions to Choose From...


Coming Out

"I went flying in there. I got shoved in my seat I hit my head. I bruised up my knee pretty bad."

Does anyone else find the hoopla (joyous at getting to use that word) surrounding the release of latest Sony Playstation to be both amusing and sad?

"I thought about going home to shower first because I haven'’t showered in three days, but I think I'’m just going to get another energy drink, log on and get started," said Nathaniel Lord, a recent graduate of California Institute of the Arts.

Is anyone surprised that, yet again, there is a "shortage"?

Do you find it ironic that Sony may be losing money despite some units being sold for $600-$700 a piece?

Can you think of any thing worth standing in a long line, risking your life for?

UPDATE: Police use pepperspray on crazy crowd in Virginia.

ANOTHER UPDATE: Big ass mob rushes Orlando Mall

YET ANOTHER UPDATE: Escaped prisoner apprehended in line for PS3 at Best Buy.

WELL OF COURSE AN UPDATE: "While the rest of America's working families are waiting patiently in line, Senator Edwards wants to cut to the front."

The Very Bad Idea


Murder & Mayhem in Muskego Pics

David Morrell; author - audience member

Joe Konrath crams down the latest Crimespree in hopes of passing the quiz later that afternoon.

John Connolly in a solemn moment of contemplation.

Nathan Singer and John Connolly share their favorite scenes from Jackass II.

Nathan Singer wonders if his questionable navigational skills will be able to get him home again.

Libby Fischer Hellman deep in thought.

Judy Bobolik (sp) and Ruth Jordan taking mental notes.

Dianne Jordan; ace photographer...

Blake Crouch and Marcus Sakey wonder if Jon Jordan could swallow a small sheep.