A velvet fist in an iron glove.
If God wanted me to excercise he wouldn't have made sure I have such a nice recliner.....And he wouldn't have invented DVD players.and put a gyro restaraunt two blocks from my house.....
See, that's what I thought my neighbor meant when he came over this morning and said I needed to be "exorcised." I thought we were going to go work out. Then he started speaking in tongues and squirting holy water on me from an old Poland Spring sport bottle. One thing led to another, and now I have to drag my ice auger out to the lake tonight and drill a hole so I can sink his body. Some days it just doesn't pay to answer the fucking door, y'know?
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