2005-03-30

“I believe it’s a vision from God,”

Or....

"Do You Believe in Jesus, in a Yorkshire Theme Park?"

Andrea Weber, Christian, Creationist, business woman and visionary, has launched a £144 million mission that she says will bring Bible stories to life by turning them into thrilling rides.

Mrs Webster, married with two children aged 7 and 12, believes in the “entire trustworthiness and supreme authority” of the Bible “in all matters of faith and conduct”, including the creation of the world in seven days.

“I want the park to encompass the magic of the Bible and present it in a way that will be exciting and relevant.” America already has a Christian theme park, The Holy Land Experience in Orlando, Florida, where tourists eat and on the Via Dolorosa as Jesus, played by an actor, is kicked and spat upon by Roman soldiers before being “nailed” to a cross that is raised by a hydraulic motor.
And, they can visit: where loads of air conditioning provides a break from the relentless Florida sun.

Back in England, visitors to "Ark Alive" could slide down the Tower of Babel! climb aboard Noah’'s Ark!, Part the Red Seas by being strapped into seats, visitors are chased by the Egyptian army to the Red Sea, where the waters part! and play David and Goliath by traveling through a tunnel depicting battles between the Philistines and the Israelites, visitors can slay mighty warriors with a laser! and be a part of Jonah and the Whale in a boat ride where visitors are swallowed by a whale, then vomited from its mouth down a water slide into a lake!



Children will be able to experience the expulsion from the Garden of Eden!, escape from a lion’s den! and, in the Sea of Galilee, walk on water (possible due to concealed stepping stones).

Mrs. Webster says, this is “where Disney meets the Bible.”

"Ark Alive", which is scheduled to open in 2008, will be funded by a million Christians donating £144 each. Destitute believers are asked to pray for the park’s success.

“If a million Christians each donate £144 we will reach our target,” she said. “That, in itself, will be a great testament to the power of faith.”

Sinners Repent!!!!

3 comments:

Just Somebody said...

Wasn't that an episode of the Simpsons I saw repeated the other week ?

Flanders built the park after his wife died with help from the others ??

Yet again the world follows the Simpsoids....

Jen Jordan said...

It seems there's no commandant about making the Lord's name a theme park ride.

Anonymous said...

Cheesification-huh. There have been sculptures made out of cheese so I naturaly got these images of crusifixes made out of cheese. The rays coming out of the clouds representing Gods voice, made out of cheese. If you made an ark out of cheese, would it float?