2006-03-23

Where Will We Get Our Salty Balls?

Did Isaac Hayes really quit South Park?

Wednesday's show , which drew masssive ratings, lambasted Hayes after his departure following the now-infamous Scientology episode (banned from the air in Tom Cruise's litigious wake, full episode here) that fans of the show demand be aired lest they boycott Mission Impossible III.

In the latest episode, Trey Parker and Matt Stone depict Chef as having fallen prey to an insidious cult, the "Super Adventure Club", subsequently killing him off in a manner that would make Kenny jealous. This after having carefully avoiding the subject for years.

Parker explains, "To be honest, what kept us from doing it before was Isaac Hayes. We knew he was a Scientologist and he's an awesome guy. We're like, 'Let's just avoid that for now.' Finally, we just had to tell Isaac, 'Dude, we totally love working with you, and this is nothing personal, it's just we're South Park, and if we don't do this, we're belittling everything else we've ripped on.'"

But today, FoxNews reports that Isaac Hayes has been in the hospital since Jan. 17th, following a stroke, and never issued a statement. Apparently, the Scientology Center issued it "for" him.

Defamer sums it all up more eloquently:

"While likening Scientology to a "fruity little club" may be funny in a bratty sort of way, we're wondering if perhaps it's giving them too easy a retaliatory target. They are, after all, a club that helped many a conflicted little fruit kick their dangerous anti-psychotic medication habits, resolve their past-life issues, and maximize their life potential."