2005-11-25

Best Admit it Now

This makes me vulnerable to attack but I may as well admit it.


I fucking hate, detest, abhor, loathe and despite Christmas music. Some songs more than others but all songs are included.

There we are.

I feel better having gotten that off my chest.

Thank you.

14 comments:

Russel said...

Nothing wrong with that.

It shows eminent good taste on your part. Of course I have an excuse for hating it all. I work in retail. From around now I have to listen to Christmas music pretty much all the time.

Although it means I get to do my big Noddy Holder impression which scared away all the customers.

Chris said...

I am so with you on that sentiment.

Jennifer Jordan said...

Retail could persuade the most die hard Christmas fan to hate Christmas. Don't know how many day after Thanksgivings I worked but seeing supposed cheer turn into snappish, short-tempered rudeness rather destroys the charm of the holidays.

There's nothing like an over abundance of something to inspire intense dislike.

Gabriele C. said...

Some of the songs are nice enough, but the permanent jingling of them in TV, shops, neighbour households and other places makes me hate them.

In former times, when they were sung only by the families and in church, I suppose they had their charm.

John S. said...

I'm with you, Jen. I can't stand it either. And from now until New Year's Eve it's all my wife will play.

Not only that, but when my wife's family gets together they sing. Totally off-key and ear-splitting.

Michael said...

Well, I'll happily go you one further: All Christmas music should and must be destroyed...along with anyone who likes it.

There.

Anonymous said...

com'on now, christmas music is great! the repetitive nature, the mantra-like quality of music that we have been forced to listen to our whole lives.

It is a natural stimulant of consumption. I wouldn't call it a conspiracy, but it's damn near close. I can almost gaurantee that a study would reveal that people are more likely to spend money if christmas songs are playing. It is yet another fuel for mass consuption. as a genre, Christmas music might just be the longest running commercial in the history of the modern world.

Stuart MacBride said...

Every time I hear Noddy Holder shouting "It’s Chriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiistmas!" I want to examine the inside of his cranium with a baseball bat.

Where’s the Geneva convention when you need it? Surely 'So here it is, Merry Christmas' counts as a weapon of mass irritation!

Jennifer Jordan said...

In Milwaukee, there is a commercial for a adio station that will be playing the sugary badness known as Christmas music for the rest of the year. Even AFTER Christmas.

The ad features a snippet of a carol by the sick inducing Paul McCartney that never fails to have me flailing for the remote. Said song is then in my head for hours as I glower and shake my fist at the music gods.

Having quite a laugh over this one, aren't they?

Sarah said...

It depends on the kind of Christmas music.

Oddly, because of my choir brat days, I've become a big fan of the really traditional carol-type stuff (Adeste Fideles has a great tune. Ding Dong Merrily on High, stupid title and all, has a great extended gloria, espec if you're a soprano like moi) and some of the newer settings (Ralph Vaughan Williams wrote this Christmas choral piece that is absolutely stunning.)

But most of the crap on the radio? Kill it all. Bludgeon it. Except for David Bowie & Bing Crosby's "The Little Drummer Boy" which never fails to crack me up because it made for great television. On so many levels.

JamesO said...

Perhaps as an antidote I might recommend The Arrogant Worms - Christmas Turkey, featuring such notable numbers as 'Santa's Gonna Kick Your Ass', 'Dad Threw Up On Christmas Day' and 'Vincent The Christmas Virus'.

Best to play it in July though.


Otherwise I couldn't agree more. Christmas music should be banned under the Geneva Convention as a form of psychological warfare.

Then again, maybe playing Cliff Richard at full volume would drive those crazy mullahs out of Basrah...

(incidentally, the word verification for this comment is 'prayjk', which is kind of appropriate)

Anonymous said...

I just start Bob River's I AM SANTA CLAUS running through my head (the one done to the tune of Black Sabbath's Iron Man). That gets the treacle out.

Anonymous said...

I would generally agree with you Jen but who can deny Fairytale of New York with lines such as:


"You’re a bum
You’re a punk
You’re an old slut on junk
Lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed
You scumbag, you maggot
You cheap lousy faggot
Happy christmas your arse
I pray God it’s our last"


Xmas but with a bit of bite, that's what I say... Cx

Russel said...

And yet despite Fairytale's apparently cynical lyrics they *still* play it in the Shopping Centres at top volume over and over again. So I'm afraid it too goes into my basket of Christmas hell.

Pleasingly, however, we had a little band playing trumpets and things in the middle of the Overgate the other day. It was quite pleasant, actually.