Bear with Me

In two bearly related stories, a bear has been spotted in Germany for the first time since 1835. Authorities in the Bavarian Alps plan to find the bear, trap the bear, anaesthetise the bear, tag the bear and release the bear.

In the UK, PETA protestors are pissed about the Queen's guards wearing bear pelt hats.

Said PETA person Anita Singh: "People wanted to show how passionate they are about this cause. Sometimes drastic things call for drastic measures. The British government, which has outlawed fur farming, is perpetrating this. This wouldn't be allowed in Britain."

Fake fur has been suggested as an alternative but it has it's down sides.

Lieutenant Colonel Peter Dick-Peter said fake fur is far from fabulous.

"It looks like a 60's Beatle wig. It just doesn't look right and if the wind blows it sticks up. The rain soaks into the fibre and it ends up an extremely heavy piece of sodden material on somebody's head."

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