This is a story from Reuters that I lifted and left intact. Rare for me but you'll see why. Reading it in all it's glory really is better than my asinine little rewrites.
"A man on a scooter menaced a German town until angry locals performed a citizen's arrest on him at the scene of his third crash in two hours, police said on Friday.
The 22-year-old man first crashed the scooter as he took a corner in the western town of Herzogenrath, losing his helmet in the process, police in nearby Aachen said.
Unfazed, the man remounted and plowed straight into the back of a parked car. He flew head over heels through the back window, landing inside and causing some 2,000 euros in damage.
"Then he crawled out of the vehicle again, and sped off," an Aachen police spokesman said. "He had no driving ability. However, he was obviously a fairly tough fellow."
Onlookers tried to stop the man, but he fled.
Two hours later, bystanders were shocked as the scooter crashed leaving a gas station, this time with the man as passenger. Locals called police and held the man and his companion until officers arrived to arrest them.
Police said the man was being investigated on suspicion of drink driving and fleeing the scene of an accident. He was not named."
Thank you, D