2005-01-14

Dong Resin gets me in the giggle bone. Again!

Hippos

You'll need:

  • 1,000-gallon tank per hippo
  • 1,000 gallons of water
  • Crane
  • 1-pound sedative
  • Soothing hippo music
  • 2 Aspirin (for you)

From MoversNet, the actual U.S.P.S. guidelines to shipping hippos.

How to pack: Hippos

1. Fill your tank with 800 gallons of water. Start yesterday. Remember, a medium-sized hippo takes up at least 200 gallons. (Just out of curiosity, why do you have a hippo, anyway?)

2. Apply sedative. Take two Aspirin.

3. Hold it, hold it - put the hippo in the tank, first. Start with soothing hippo music, followed by a large winch and crane.

4. Now go relax in a hot bath before the forklift arrives.

WAIVER: We in no way advocate moving a hippo or any animal without the express advice and consent of your local vet or zoo keeper. If you'd like advice from a veterinarian on moving with pets click here .

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