2006-01-04

And 40% Sunshine Up your Ass


Dave Letterman greeted Bill with a pleasant "How was your holiday?", Bill responded smugly, "I had a nice winter solstice."

Then Dave, the hero of my day, went on with "I ignore stuff like that, it doesn't really affect me, I go ahead and do what I want." Then, as O'Reilly went point-by-point through each town that has nuttily legislated against even secular Christmas displays, Dave exasperatedly asked him, "Isn't this the kind of thing where every once in 20 years, someone says, 'we have to put diapers on the horses,' and that's all there is to it?"

When he asked Bill if a member of his family ever died in combat, Bill said no, to which Dave replied, "Then you can hardly speak for her, can you?" Dave continued to fight O'Reilly on the topic, saying "I'm very concerned with people like yourself that don't have anything but endless sympathy for someone like Cindy Sheehan." Letterman's kicker came a few moments later, when he said, "I'm not smart enough to debate you point to point on this, but I have the feeling that 60% of what you say is crap."

O'Reilly had recently asked recently if the post-stroke Dick Clark should really be handling something like appearing on the New Year's Eve special as his speech has been affected.

Others who have expressed some degree of dislike for Mr. O'Reilly, O'Reilly Sucks and Sweet Jesus, I Hate Bill O'Reilly.

O'Reilly has been reemed before by the one celebrity I'm willing to admit I have a wild schoolgirl crush on, Jon Stewart.

4 comments:

Jim Winter said...

Bill O'Reilly: He exists to make Stephen Colbert funny.

Not that Colbert has any shortage of videots to lampoon, but Bill O'Reilly is the Cadillac of dumbasses.

(Hmm... I think I found my new tag line for next week.)

Jim Winter said...

Bill O'Reilly is the Cadillac of Idiots

killtheoldman said...

Would I be introuble if i mentioned that i thought he was kinda cool?

C.W. Cale said...

I think of Bill as proof that chaos theory trumps religion.
Neither god nor the devil would ever come up with such a smug muddled jackass. I'm just glad he's on "their" side!
It has to be a quirk of fate that he even exists! -like Bjork, or Flan, or the Porsche Cayenne.
(I didn't actually mean to rhyme!)