What's News in the World

A woman in Australia paints with her breasts.

Di Peel sold her first canvas for £5. Her second went for £10. Now she's painting an order for 10 at £40 each.

"I sign every picture with my nipple."

Di, a self-described "big woman" works at her kitchen table with an easel. "I either apply the paint to my breasts and lean on to the canvas or apply the paint to the canvas and then lean into it to spread the paint.She has to take a shower every time she changes color. She describes the paintings as abstract flowers.

Let's all thank Daniel Hatadi for giving me the link for this luscious pic>

A Swiss man returned home from his holiday to find a dead body in his living room.

Johann Rauber, from Muenchenbuchsee, Switzerland, was more than a little shocked to find the as yet unidentified corpse lying on his couch."Whenever you go away for a couple of weeks, you always return home expecting to find that something has gone off, but it's usually a lump of cheese or slice of bread, not a dead body."

The Berne police have no idea who the dead man is, how the dead man got in or what the hell is going on.

Man trips and destroys priceless vases

An unidentified and very embarrassed visitor to the Fitzwilliam Museum in Cambridge, England, tripped on his shoelace, stumbled down a stairway and destroyed a set of three priceless 300-year-old Qing dynasty Chinese vases.

I hasten to add, if you're feeling guilty for laughing, the man was unhurt.

Steve Baxter was also there for a visit and happened to see the whole thing.

"We watched the man fall as if in slow motion. He landed in the middle of the vases and they splintered into a million pieces. He was still sitting there stunned when staff appeared. Everyone stood around in silence, as if in shock. Then the man started talking. He kept pointing to his shoelace and saying: "There it is; that's the culprit.""

'Dog sh*t' ham

Mick Woods, of Wakefield, England, by pure chance happened to find himself reading the ingredients on a package of sliced, cooked ham one afternoon. Listed in the additives: dog shit.

Says Woods, rather sagely, "Obviously I haven't eaten it. It sort of puts you off."

Woods and his partner Tracy were amused and disgusted at the same time.

"We spent 40 minutes laughing. But we haven't put any in the kids' sandwiches and we had something else for our tea."

Sliced ham manufacturer H R Hargreaves & Son said it axed an employee over the labeling prank and was trying to recall the ham.

Said a smartly dressed and very tense spokesman, "We can't have people fooling about with food products. A number of packs are affected. We're trying to find out what shops they're in."