God, sometimes you do come through.
Today was a good day.
I write that with a feeling of awe and gentle thanks to the universe.
This last year, for various reasons, was hard for me. Towards the end of my days were characterized with suspended dread. I was an automaton, going through my days barely doing what was needed to keep going.
My writing came to a halt. My communication was made up of cyber grunts. I grew to hate the phone - HATE the phone.
Now, for the first time in a long time, I look out my window and notice the way nature paints the sky and colors the trees. Today for the first time in a long time music has stilled me and made me whole. Today for the first time in a long time, I am don't know dread. Today, for the first time in a long time, tears I have are for concepts and memories and a sorrow for the state of the world instead of tears of fear and loss.
Today I rediscovered that eating an orange while I work is a bad idea. There are little pieces of orange on the screen, on the desk top, on the mouse, on the phone and on the cd player.
From the start of this post to the end, the sky outside my window went from orange to pink to purple to gray to almost black and I had enough quiet in me to see it.